Untouched by the world of sexual experiences, there exists a unicorn land where virgin women tightly-hold onto their hymen as a mark of their character. Right? Wrong.
It’s time to shun the wrong perception that songs, movies and gossip sessions on ‘virginity-par-charcha‘ have fed us. Let’s talks virginity myths and facts in this chapter of sex education 101:
1. Your “cherry” can’t be popped!
We all seem to have false ideas about what the hymen ( a.k.a cherry ) is. It is often assumed that the hymen is a thin membrane that goes over the vagina. After penetrative sex, this hymen is broken, which results in bleeding. Its ‘absence’ is seen to signify a lack of virginity.
All of this is FALSE! The hymen doesn’t completely cover the vagina. This thin elastic membrane sits either outside the vagina or just inside of it. So the first time you experience sexual intercourse, you aren’t popping anything but just stretching the membrane a little bit.
So, always remember ladies: the hymen isn’t a sign of your virginity. It is significantly elastic and can be penetrated without breaking–but fragile enough to be affected by intense physical activity too.
2. Stop believing in absurd virginity tests!
The hymen doesn’t disappear forever after your first sexual intercourse. In fact, it stays in the body forever. Yet, many cultures have ritualized displaying bloody sheets after a married couple gets intimate for the first time to show that the young woman was a virgin.
Yet, what really is the connection between losing one’s virginity and bleeding? According to medical professionals, many women do not experience tearing or bleeding of the hymen the first time they have sex. This myth has a negative impact on women soon to experience sex.
The fear of pain or the anticipation of bleeding makes it harder for the muscles around the opening of the vagina to be relaxed. The feelings attached to the probable pain of penetration spread through the myth are the real culprits rather than the experience itself.
3. A visit to the gynaecologist won’t affect your virginity
Going for your first gynaecologist exam often brings anxiety, yet there is also a misconception that surrounds it. Similar to tampons, gynaecological exams are there to ensure reproductive health.
Gentle inspection of the external genitals is recommended by the Ministry of Health and Family Welfare as a routine part of health care for kids and teens.
In a Pap smear test, an exam used to detect precancerous cells from the cervix, an instrument called a speculum is used to spread the walls of the stretchy hymen and vagina. However, the speculum‘s movement is wrongly considered to be an equivalent to sexual penetration–which often discourages women from taking the Pap test, leaving the potential diseases go unnoticed.
4. Your sexual partner can’t tell whether you’re a virgin or a not with certainty
If an experienced gynaecologist can’t tell if a woman has had intercourse by examining her hymen, then how on earth can your partner? On the other hand, to practice healthy sexual health it is essential to build relationships of trust with your partner. Being open with them about your sexual history can build deeper connections and keep you both healthy and happy.
Our ‘Lashman rekha’ of virginity is based on elastic scrunchies aka hymen that are built and evolve into different anatomic variations with different experiences. The intent in talking about virginity myths and facts is to shift the focus of the collective from just the status of the hymen to the entire knowledge of intimate health.